According to the definition in the Collins dictionary:
If someone leaves for greener pastures, or in British English pastures new, they leave their job, their home, or the situation they are in for something they think will be much better.
That was in part my motivation, but, in reality I left my previous job in search of a better iteration of myself. I had often asked myself, when I had thought of moving on, why I couldn’t make the positive changes I wanted where I was, and each time I convinced myself that I could and that what I actually needed was a change of mindset rather than scenery.
I don’t know if you have ever tried, but, changing mindset is actually pretty hard! I set myself learning objectives, I kept a list of articles and books I wanted to read and I decided to take more initiative. I was fed up of being fed up and complaining about how things didn’t work, I knew I was better than that. For a while, it worked, but, then the niggling feeling came back and I started to wonder what other opportunities where out there.
I have heard about a condition called impostor syndrome and sometimes I wonder if I have it and other times I think I am flattering myself for thinking that I have it and in fact I am actually an impostor. In a nutshell, someone who has impostor syndrome constantly feels as though sooner or later they will be found out and that someone will tap them on the shoulder and say “You obviously don’t know what you’re doing, please get your things and leave”. This feeling is completely unfounded and can also torment individuals that have proven themselves time and again. Hence the reason I said that at times I think I am flattering myself…
I decided to go for it, I had everything to gain and if it didn’t go well, I still had my old job anyway. Which to be clear, I really liked. Fortunately I got the job and now I am approaching the end of my second month with Hitachi. I already feel that I have learned so much and that I am beginning to add some value to the team. We are working on a challenging project with an ambitious delivery date and our work is very visible as it will be replacing some of the key business applications that have been with the company for the best part of two decades.
So how about my latest iteration? Better than the last I think, but, there are still plenty more stories to deliver and a few legacy bugs to fix. Overall, I am happy I decided to take on this new challenge and I am feeling optimistic that it will be a valuable and worthwhile experience both professionally and personally.